On Fests and Buying

The five stages of music festival FOMO

Denial

$400 for tickets? I’d rather use the money for video games.

Anger

Who do they think they are charging that much?  The lineup is probably going to suck. I bet Nickelback will be the headliner. 

Bargaining

I’ll just watch the live stream and throw my own festival.

Depression

Standing in a crowded, oppressively hot field while drinking warm wine from a plastic bag defines my identity. Porta-potties are the wellspring of my soul. I can’t believe I’m going to miss this life-changing experience. 

Acceptance

Ramen is underrated. I’m selling the Switch. It’s basically a steal at $400. Nickelback rocks!